We owe it to each other to tell stories - Neil Gaiman

Thursday, 14 February 2013

the truth on valentines day

 I have been in love twice in my life. The first time when I was 13 and then again when I was 19. Neither of these times turned out especially well. The first time, because I didn't realise until it was too late. And the second, could be a bitter story, but let's just say he stopped loving me. And I suppose I had unrealistic expectations.

This isn't one of those angry single girls valentines day rants, it is just a realisation, a truth that I have come to realise, so I thought I'd share it on valentines day to make myself clear, and stop me from rolling my eyes at others celebrating the day.

Moulin Rouge, Must Love Dogs, Titanic, Atonement, The Notebook, Armageddon... these are among my favourite romantic movies. Love stories like those of Derek and Meredith on Grey's Anatomy, Rhett and Scarlet in Gone with the Wind, Elizabeth Bennett and Mr Darcy, Mara and Noah, Etienne and Anna, Romeo and Juliet, Helen and Lucas, Dace and Daire... I could continue for a while. But I won't,  you know in case you all start thinking that I make lists of these things. I can tell you why it is among yours too. Movies like the mentioned, even books and series as mentioned are among your favourites especially because of the story behind the love that 2 of the people in these stories have.

I want this whole GWTW moment
Those stories, are the kind of story that you want to have one day. I know because it is the kind of story that I want to have one day. I want a Rhett Butler who will tell me that I should be kissed often. I want a Derek Shepherd who adores me, and would fall apart if anything happened to me like when Meredith nearly died from hypothermia. I want an Etienne St Claire, a Lucas Delos, a Mr Darcy, a Dace, a Christian, a Jake, a Jack - I want someone that will inspire within me what I feel when I read these books or watch these movies. There's that one moment in the movie, series or book, that just has you wanting that love so badly.

But here's the thing - most of these plot lines were written by women. Or they were written by someone who understands how to get you hooked by writing something that you want but can't have so will be coming back again and again to get what you can't have.

Relationships are better in books too
So that's the truth I want to share with you on valentines day. Love is real, real is love. Falling in love is wonderful, but our expectations will never be fulfilled because the boy/man you're in love with is not a script writer. Adjust your expectations and you'll be happy, because everything else that you see in movies and books is just fantasy. And I don't think you want the tragedy that comes with those story lines. Do you?

1 comment:

  1. I agree. I am still quite young so I haven't really been properly in love, but a lot of people I know have, and their relationships and the love they have experienced aren't really the same as what they have read in books. Great post! :)


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